Improving your self-esteem can make a lot of difference in your life: Feel better about yourself and your take on many things becomes more positive. But where does self-esteem come from and how do you get more of it? Some answers.Self-Esteem Is A Fickle PartnerWhen we lack it, it seems impossible to gain. When we have enough of it, we usually don't spare it a thought and take it for granted. But during our lives most of us will sooner or later go through some encounters with self-esteem. To my personal observation it's more women who struggle with the issue of low self-esteem, although men of course have problems there, too. Maybe women are just more vocal about it.In that regard, and funnily enough, another observation I made is that it's often beautiful women, who seem perfect to everyone else, that have problems with a lack of self-esteem. Maybe instead of enjoying their lives they are obsessing about their physical imperfections, trying to achieve that perfect look.The other day I saw a woman on TV who is probably few years older than me, and had 50 something surgeries. She still wasn't happy with the way she looked, because her goal was to look like a Barbie doll. I must have missed the point at which Barbie became a model for physical perfection or at least why she chose it. But it didn't take me long to figure out.The Big Factors Of Self-EsteemIn order to understand why so many people are struggling with self-esteem issues we have to understand what is causing you to have these issues in the first place. Once you dig deep into the root of the problem, you can start rebuilding your self-worth and hopefully begin to understand how special and unique you and we all are, different from each other, very unique and beautiful.At the basis of self-esteem is our self-image and there are two big factors that play a huge role in how we come up with it:
- Our childhoods are where our basic belief systems are created. These beliefs about how the world works may be right or wrong, but as children we take them at face value. It takes a good bit of growing up to recognize that there are different beliefs. As children we are like sponges, have no alternatives and absorb everything. If we grow up in a loving and caring home, it usually doesn't creat any problems. But if it's a violent environment, we come up with a set of rules that can later cause us and others a lot of grief.
- The media these days dictates us a lot of our concepts about the world and ourselves. Before there was radio, television or the internet we only had our immediate family and community to make sense of things. Of course we can use media sources to educate ourselves in a positive way, but more often than not they paint a picture of the world that is removed from reality - without media, the fashion industry would have a hard time dictating young girls an aloof definition of "attractivity" (and turn them into Barbie).