Do you believe that working out and having big muscles will get you girls? Many, many guys think that’s the ticket. But if that is why you do all that sweating and grinding away with them weights you will be in for one big, bad surprise.
A Blast From The Past
Take a look at the three guys below. All of them were big, really big stars in their day and women swooned over them. Heck, even today girls get fuzzy feelings in their stomachs when you mention James Dean. From left to right, these are Clark Gable, James Dean and Marlon Brando:
What do they have in common? They look fit, but none of them precisely are what you might call extraordinarily muscular. Clark Gable wasn’t even really that good-looking, as he had some rather prominent jug ears, and surely is not the kind of guy you on first glance would judge a womanizer, would you? Yet the man was notorious when it came to women: he was married five times and is said to have had sex with just about all his co-stars.
But Aren’t Girls Into Muscles?
You might of course argue that they got girls because they were movie stars. But that is putting the cart before the horse. Someone discovered them and made them into movie stars, because they all shared one quality: they had charisma.
Big muscles alone don’t give you that. When you think about it, guys huge enough to look like mutants are a dime a dozen. There sure are girls specifically into those, but to most this is just grotesque and sometimes more of a turnoff than anything else. How many girls comment on the sexiness of Arnold Schwarzenegger as Conan the Barbarian? Of course, Schwarzenegger was a movie star too, but his early action and fantasy movies were favorites of a mainly male audience in the middle of adolescence and females don’t often connect with them.
Movies producers of course know that being big, huge and strong is a vivid fantasy of many a young man going through the woes of puberty, not to mention those who will keep a feeling of inferiority through their entire lives. But don’t mistake a male fantasy of what women want with reality: the guy who created the Conan character, Robert E. Howard, lived at home, had only ever had one girlfriend, and at age 30 killed himself when his mother died.
So, Wait, We Shouldn’t Work Out?
You should work out, very much so. But not to get women, because that hope very likely will be disappointed. Many guys who start working out in hopes it will make them class A in getting girls either give up or become one of the obnoxious meatheads who think that intimidating others means they respect you.
If you have trouble with the other sex, then, please, do work out, but also work on your self-respect. Self-respect – being comfortable with yourself and around others – is where much charisma comes from. Together with a nice physique, that is the true killer combination.